


on the falling shoals, I wonder why me?

by Laeana



Series: ℓove is a seduction game, [1]
Category: Formula 1 RPF
Genre: Alternate Universe - College/University, Angst and Feels, Bets & Wagers, Comfort, Emotional Manipulation, Falling In Love, Implied/Referenced Self-Harm, Implied/Referenced Sex, Jos Verstappen's A+ Parenting, Love Confessions, M/M, Past Child Abuse, Strangers to Lovers, Unhealthy Relationships
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-11-05
Updated: 2020-11-05
Packaged: 2021-03-09 01:20:11
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 4,159
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/27406429
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Laeana/pseuds/Laeana
Summary: It's been years since Daniel and Charles started a seduction game.But the end of their studies is coming and, with it, the conclusion of their relationship.An evening, Charles challenges Daniel to seduce a boy, alone, sitting down at the bar. If he succeeds, Charles will finally give in and they'll stop beat around the bush.But what if this boy, this lonely and melancolic boy was hidding more than anyone knew ...Oh, what if Daniel was falling in love ...
Relationships: Charles Leclerc/Daniel Ricciardo (implied), Daniel Ricciardo/Max Verstappen
Series: ℓove is a seduction game, [1]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/2002225
Comments: 9
Kudos: 26





	on the falling shoals, I wonder why me?

**Author's Note:**

  * A translation of [won't you come show me the way](https://archiveofourown.org/works/22324264) by [Laeana](https://archiveofourown.org/users/Laeana/pseuds/Laeana). 



> featuring : Sirens Calls by Cats on trees

Daniel is aware of his charm. How could he not be? In short, he knows it. He even plays with it sometimes. Sitting at this bar, he exchanges a sparkling look with Charles. They have been turning around for several moments but the Monegasque still keeps him waiting.

Not that he's particularly complaining, they've had affairs outside of their own relationship. That they never defined. A touch of sexual tension, a little too much attachment, characters that could turn out to be compatible ...

Students at the same university, not in the same course, he is in the process of graduating. Very soon. And maybe he'll finally decide to talk seriously with Charles. Although the notion of seriousness tends to scare the other away, he also doesn't want them to miss anything. Surely worth a try at least.

— Dan ?

— Mmh ?

— What are you thinking about ? I don't like not being the center of your attention.

And with that the youngest pulls a haughty smile, just as arrogant as he is also sure of his charisma.

— Us.

— Develop ?

— At the end of the year I will have my diploma you know.

It pulls a pout on the face of the other man, pouting pout, the one he does when everything is not going as he wants. Eternal capricious child that he sometimes finds it difficult to bear. But how does Pierre do it every day ? He’ll say that it is part of his charm in a way.

— You are right. It bothers me to say it. I almost forgot that time was passing. Let's do so.

He takes the time to sip his drink, not sure of what his friend is going to suggest.

— Do you see the brown boy leaning on the bar, ocean blue eyes with the shirt over there ?

He searches but does not take long to find it. This stranger has a rather sad look that emerges from him, annoyed, while he consults his phone for the umpteenth time. He seems juvenile for the moment but is rather beautiful. Of a majestic melancholy.

— Max Verstappen. In my faculty. If you manage to seduce him, by that I mean make him fall in love with you and put him in your bed, then we can talk seriously.

— In a relationship with ? Isn't that a little twisted ? He did something to you, didn't he ?

Charles glares at him and he knows he has hit his target right in the heart. His pride must have been offended by that youngster over there and he wants revenge. Very well. He shrugs his shoulders.

— If you wish.

— I expect a lot from you and your reputation as a proven seducer, Dan ! Don’t disappoint me.

And just with those words, the other student leaves the bar almost in a hurry. He sighs, runs a hand through his curls before approaching his "target".

— You sigh madly and you have the eyes of a downcast cocker spaniel, what's going on my beautiful ?

Max barely looks at him then rolls his eyes, clearly unimpressed by the attempt.

— And I should confide in a stranger who approaches me with sentences of mediocre quality because ...?

— Because this stranger is very handsome ?

The younger one flutters his eyes but this time he's sure to see a slight redness on his cheekbones.

— And because he cares about you ?

Almost whispered. He drops onto the stool next to him and the other boy doesn't recoil. A better start.

— So what's going on ?

— Let's say that I have been stood up by my date to keep it simple.

— Ah, ouch.

He calls out the bartender and places an additional order for him and that of his sidekick.

— In that case, what do you say if I replace him ?

— I guess at the point where I am ...

— Come on, you're winning on the exchange, right ?

This time Max smiles. A shadow of a smile. Already that won for him honestly.

— I'm Daniel Ricciardo by the way.

— Max Verstappen. How not to know your infamous reputation ?

Exhaustive. He didn't expect it.

— It doesn't define me.

— Hard to believe, Daniel. Difficult.

He nibbles the inside of his cheek. A difficulty parameter has just been added there, it’s not really fair.

— Your game with Charles is almost famous, you know ? They take the bets sometimes.

— Who are they ? The other students ?

The youngest one shrugs his shoulders. Among other things, yes. He is silent for a moment, busy collecting his thoughts. He had a slight suspicion, it's hard to miss his reputation but doesn't like being trusted so much.

— And you're going to let that define me ? Should better get to know me.

Max opens his mouth, as if he wants to say something, but he doesn't give him time since he gets up and picks up his things. He leaves the bar and, as he had expected, the other student comes after him.

— Hold on ! Don’t be upset for so little.

— You'll learn, Maxy, that I'm never upset.

The Dutchman stops in the middle of the street, looks around, looking almost dubious.

— Was that calculated ?

— Yes besides after I intend to kidnap and sequester you in my apartment. No, I just wanted to get some fresh air.

— But you wanted me to follow you ?

— Obviously, I find you very cute.

Max moans and buries his face in his hands, looking super embarrassed. He laughs softly.

— Please, if you want to try to seduce me, stop it immediately.

— Why ? Don't you like compliments ?

— I don't like lies ! Flattering myself on things that I'm not is no use.

Wow, is this guy sincere ? It seems so. He comes closer, lifts his chin to gaze into the azure blue of the other boy.

— You know I'm not lying ?

— And what else ? You’re also perfect ? Seduction is based on lying. You don’t tell the truth to the other, it would be contrary to what they want to hear. Manipulate feelings, no transparency in relation to oneself.

— Psychology ? I thought you were pursuing the same studies as Charles.

Once again, his interlocutor just shrugs his shoulders. He wants to shake him up honestly. Slightly annoyed.

— Listen, if it's to be so talkative, it doesn't surprise me that your date dumped you.

Daniel just intended to shake this haggard—looking boy a bit. What he least expected was that he would start to cry. Two big tears began to run down the porcelain—colored cheeks.

— Uh, I ...

A sob escapes from Max's throat, who tries to wipe his tears in vain.

— Sorry, I shouldn't have said that.

— No, don't apologize. You are probably right. From the start he must have laughed at me. Of my pathetic hopes.

There is a moment of hesitation. He doesn't know where his limits lie; they are strangers to each other after all. 

In the end, he comes forward and decides to slowly come and take his company for one evening in his arms.

— I'm sorry I said that, okay ?

Little by little, the youngest one calms down. He finally pulls back. 

— I'm embarrassed. Sorry, I shouldn't have reacted like that, it was a hard week.

— No no. I had inappropriate words.

Silence falls over them, they glance at each other. Neither really knows what to say. He feels himself going back years. Long before his dating game with Charles began, when he really cared about things.

— Are you sure you still want to come and seduce me ? I am not an easy person, I have too many doubts. I would probably tire you out in the end.

— I think I'm the only one who can judge.

Max is a breath of fresh air. Maybe even innocence. In any case, he knows he is making a mistake in accepting the bet. Because this boy doesn't deserve this.

This is something he realizes as he spends time with him. By picking him up when he comes out of college, taking him on dates. 

— Hey ! You, you're Charles' boyfriend, aren't you ? 

Daniel raises his eyebrows, turning to the voice. It is a brown boy with blue eyes who is standing in front of him. Pierre, if he remembers correctly.

— Not really. 

— You're Daniel, aren't you ?

— Yes, are you really Pierre ?

A slight accent seems to escape from this boy's voice. This is something pretty grave.

— That's it. But "not really" is not an answer. Most of the campus thinks—

— Dan ! You were waiting for me ?

Max walks up to them quickly, a big smile on his face, Lando on his heels, as he often does. Seeing Pierre, the Dutchman frowns.

— Pierre ? You know each other ?

— A little bit. Seeing him, I just wanted to come talk to him about Char—

— Should we go if we don't want to be late ?

He knows it's not fair to interrupt the conversation at this point. He just doesn't want to talk about it. Lately he's been avoiding the Monegasque, doesn't want to see him too much because he doesn't see the point.

He left behind great aimless conversations, failed attempts at seduction. It is no longer of any use to him when he has someone in his sights. Someone much more interesting.

He gently grills his target, makes him fall in love with him. He will wait for his reward in due course. 

— You are right. Lando, I’ll see you later ?

— Yes of course. I'll join Carlos, can we discuss our project afterwards ?

Max nods and he grabs his hand, Pierre totally eclipsed. They have a movie theater on the program and then he plans to take him home for dinner. 

— By the way, Maxy, you still haven't told me why you chose medicine ?

When next to him his companion freezes, he knows he has not asked the right question. He's about to catch up; making him uncomfortable is not his goal at all, but it catches him off guard.

— I didn't choose it.

It's barely a whisper coming out of his partner's lips. He is worried.

— You don't have to talk about it if you don't want to.

— You make me feel safe. I don't want you to think I don't trust you. It's just really hard to talk about it. 

— Don’t worry about that. Tell me about it when you're ready, okay ?

He offers him a solar smile and his interlocutor ends up nodding. He kisses his cheek gently, trying to get back into the movie. The other student snuggles up lightly against him and puts his arm around his shoulders.

It's a real treat this evening. He thinks over and over. But it's okay, it's good. He stays out of it, he doesn't get emotionally involved. Not really. He's above it all, isn't he ?

He does all of this for Charles and only Charles, right ?

The same Charles who kisses his cheek as he walks into his apartment, that apartment Max was in just two days ago.

— So how's it going ? Good I hope ?

— Yes, rather. Tell me, do you know why Max is in the med course ?

— Mmh, no, I wasn't interested. Why ? Do you want me to find out ?

— Would you do that ?

The youngest one gives him a flirtatious smile before coming to sit on his lap with a slightly provocative gesture. He feels himself smiling lazily too.

— Anything for you, Dan.

Ah, that nickname. The same in a way that Max gives him and yet so different. Daniel realizes it instantly. Where tenderness has crept in, here it is rather a kind of not really healthy affection, developed by dint of turning around. 

Their real relationship is probably long gone. To realize this now is sad.

He keeps the Monegasque in his arms, close to his heart, and hopes that this feeling of bitterness that he feels right now is only passing.

When he hangs out with Max, people whisper as he walks by. He doesn't really care even though he knows his Dutchman hates it. The only time they get together in class is at a conference.

He slips next to him with some ease. Satisfied with these opportunities which he has in his spare time. He knows that several old school elites will be coming; some providing more than generous donations to their campus. He honestly doesn't care. He knows that almost all of the students are there just because it's compulsory.

— Today, several people have joined us. It is an improvement compared to last year ! Please welcome ...

He crouches his neck slightly, gazing at the profile of the boy to his right, his clear gaze frozen on the platform, as if dreading something.

— ... and Jos Verstappen. Thank you for coming today. Some words ?

He blinks. Did he hear ? Max's hands tighten on the armrests to the point where his knuckles turn white. He puts a hand on his shoulder.

— Are you okay ?

— I ... I ... oh my god. Dan, please. I don't want to see him. Please, I'm begging you. I don't want to talk to him, I never want to talk to him again.

He watches around him as the other students get up to go and ask questions of the former graduates and leads the Dutchman out with him. Once outside, the latter collapses to the ground, almost convulsed, as he struggles for air.

He kneels beside him. A panic attack ? They still have a lot of things they apparently need to talk about.

— Well, I ... damn. You have to listen to me Max. You have to calm down. 

It does not work. Astonishing really. It even seems to be getting worse as Max begins to scratch his throat and forearms, almost to the point of blood. He grabbed his wrists quickly.

— It's all right, look. Everything is fine. Listen to my voice. You'll have to follow me okay, listen to me. Breathe in and ... breathe out. Breathe in and out. Slowly.

Once the wheezing of the tired throat of the youngest one stops, they are replaced by sobs. Everything finally stops and he stays there, holding a boy who seems more juvenile than ever, too damaged by time.

— I got you, Maxy. You are safe.

Greatly tired, his companion nods only vaguely. Daniel sighs and ends up taking him home. Sitting on the sofa, wrapped in a plaid, staring into space, the Dutchman really seems to be just a shadow of himself.

He runs a hand through his curls, biting the inside of his cheek. He tried to get him to talk, say anything, but his guest seemed really empty.

— I'm gonna go ... outside. I might drop by to see Carlos. I'll be back in an hour or two, okay ? Rest.

What he doesn't expect is that Max gets up furiously, dropping his blanket to the floor and throwing himself on him, or rather his lips. It's both softer than he would have thought and also more violent. Desperate, the Dutchman clings to his lips like a drowned man on a lifeline.

— Max ... why ? 

— Please. I need it. Lately nothing matters. Nothing but you. You're the only one who seems to understand me at least, please.

Again, this is not wise. He knows full well that he shouldn't take advantage of his companion's distress. And at the same time ...

He lays him on the bed, carefully removing their clothes. A kind of ardor takes them. Adventurous, the youngest one lingers on every part of his body. He himself takes his time despite everything.

Harvest every moan like a treasure. It is inevitable. He's betraying all of his principles, can't even help himself. He slides into Max slowly, adjusting his pace. They make their own way together.

They're both not virgins, he assumes that's normal. 

They kiss again and again, their lips are red and swollen. He leaves traces, marks his territory.

And finally stop.

— Thanks, Dan. Thank you for everything. I love you.

Guilt swarms in his guts, mingling with all the other bad feelings already in him. He's a bad person, basically.

He sits on the edge of the bed. His phone rings with a message from Charles telling him that he has the information he wants. He gets up, gets dressed. Maybe it's time to put an end to this too.

— Well, you came quickly.

— You're not that far from my house, Charlie.

— Oh, by the way, I spoke to Pierre but he ignored me. Do you know why ? He looked angry with me.

Daniel has inquired about Pierre since. Or at least, he spoke more with the Frenchman, since he's French, and realized that he was Charles' childhood friend. Who is probably playing with him. Although Pierre is in love with Monegasque. He feels bad for him.

— Maybe you should talk to him about it ?

— Mmh ... yeah. But, I don’t know if he will confide in me. He hangs out with Daniil. 

A capricious child who is losing one of his toys.

— Did you find out otherwise ? 

— Ah yes. It was pretty straightforward. I spoke with a few of his old classmates. At least it's safe to say that his haughty, know—it—all character hasn't changed. Even if ...

Charles is silent for a moment, seeming to think, almost in conflict with himself.

— It might not be his fault. He was in basic psycho college. He has always liked behavioral analyzes, pathologies, sociology. Which, of course, was never approved by his father.

— Psychology students often seek to solve their own problems through their studies ...

A reflection out loud. Everything seems to clear up as we go. Being patient is true. But he lacks patience.

— He seemed to have left to win his bet. But in the middle of the first year, it gets blurry. No one really knows what happened. He had some sort of existential crisis and when he came back from vacation he had given up psychology to go to medicine, just like his father wanted.

That could explain the first impression he had of Max. Nostalgic, his gaze lost, because he had let go of what was surely his dream. His passion. 

— But tell me, Dan, is that a hickey on your neck ? Really ?

He runs a hand around his neck. Realizing that, yeah, yeah that's probably a hickey lying there.

— So you did it ? You really seduced him ! I'm appreciative. You really did what I asked you to do.

His reward. Like a sort of venom that slips through his veins and that his pride forces him to want in spite of everything.

— Does that mean we're finally going to stop this game ?

— Of course, I'm all yours, Dan ... if you finally end the masquerade. 

— Sorry ?

— Tell Max. Tell him you played with him. Stop being nice to him, pampering him. Be sincere, brutally sincere. 

He swallows. His eyes will search for a place to hang on. He knows this situation was going to happen but why is it so hard for him to come to terms with it ?

— Why are you hesitating so much ? Don't tell me you got attached to him ?

He can't even answer that question. He should have been less involved but ... but it's still difficult. Max is the one who makes everything difficult.

— Did you fall in love with him ? You can't ... why ? You just had to seduce him, you had to stay neutral. You should have wanted me !

Daniel lets the bitterness consume him entirely. It is true. This is the end of it all. The end of this relationship. If even friendship remains between them, they won't end up as mere strangers.

But there is nothing more to hope for from both of them. He knows it. He's been waiting for a reward he doesn't even want anymore. He doesn't want anything from Charles anymore. They are a poison together.

— Sorry, Charles. We're done, you know that. We haven't loved each other for a long time. We have to stop there before it gets any worse. 

— I don't understand ...

— Of course you do. 

He wakes up. He cannot turn around any more, he would like to talk about it longer, to comfort the Monegasque who seems on the verge of tears. 

— Wait, Dan, wait ! We can, we can ...

He closes the door behind him.

A smile rises on his lips when he realizes that he will be able to find Max at home. Too bad for his reserves, too bad for his principles which he has now broken. He goes back home.

And finds his apartment empty.

He searches in every room, finding his mate nowhere. A bad feeling swells in his consciousness. His phone rings.

— Carlos ?

— Daniel. Did you really make this bet with Charles ?

— What ? How do you know ?

— The whole campus knows. Well, it’s a rumor, nothing has been confirmed. But the rumor spreads quickly. We're looking for you or Charles, looking for the truth.

Does Max know ? Is that why he fled their apartment ? My god, what did he do ?

— Do you know where Max is ?

— Max ? No. I thought he was at your house ?

— He's not there !

His anger roars. His concern too. He just doesn't know what the hell to do.

— Look for him. Quickly.

The eagerness in his friend's voice makes him fear the worst. There are things he is not aware of. Again.

— What do you know about him ?

— Quickly ? Max's father mistreated him. He already tried to kill him from what they say. An accident. But it remains a fact. During the February vacation, Max suffered from depression. With anxiety attacks. 

Like the one he did when they saw his father ?

— We don't really know what happened but when he came back he had given up all desire to fight. Some people think ... he made a suicide attempt.

A persistent buzzing seems to reach his ears. He cannot believe it and yet the behavior of the Dutchman suggests otherwise. He, suddenly, is afraid.

— Daniel ?

— I leave you.

He hangs up. He rushes out. Few places come to mind. He leaves campus. Attempt to call Max. Leave him messages. Without any response. 

Last place he checks and he is desperate. The beach. He finds his companion's shoes on the sand. Tears come to his eyes. Daniel falls to his knees, contemplating what seems to be left of the student.

It's his fault. He should never have accepted this bet. He should never have embarked on this story. He hates, hates, hates it all so much. His dull, dull life, the only exception of which was this game of seduction with Charles.

Something that has never been good either. How do you know what is good for you when you have spent your life living it badly ?

He gets up, the sand spread over his jeans and in his shoes. He breathes. But it's trembling. He darts his gaze into the horizon, he has a lump in his throat.

It has been a long time since he felt these kinds of emotions. It's painful. He feels like his heart is breaking.

His gaze sweeps across the beach. And there he stops. 

Because Max is there, sitting on the sand, curled up in a ball. 

He is not dead ? He is not dead.

He runs up to him. The Dutchman looks up and, seeing him arrive, cries even more. He also honestly cries. He takes him in his arms.

— I thought you were dead. I was so scared. I'm so sorry, Max. So sorry.

— Why ? I knew you had played with Charles before but I really thought I was an exception. I was hoping that ...

— You're an exception. Because you did what no one had ever done before. You made me fall in love with you. You made me care about you, want you in my life, not see me live without you.

A young boy ... damaged by life, searching for the dreams he had given up. And he, left behind a tasteless life, who no longer knew what love looked like. Such a fucking perfect love story.

— I love you. 

Words that have not crossed his lips for a long time, lost during a scene by a beach. Words that have long belonged to another until their meaning is lost and they disappear. Words and he is sincere.

— Let's go home, okay ? Because it's not because I don't like the sand, but it's not very pleasant.

He pulls a little laugh from Max who nods. 

— I'm a coward. Even to die I did not know how to do it. But I'm tired of doing what I'm told to do, I wish I could be me again, Dan. So tired.

He bites his lip. Kiss that boy's cheek, his boy. 

A meeting in a bar not very famous to finally lead to this moment. Unlikely. He owes Charles something in spite of himself.

He doesn't want to think about it. He wants to hug Max a little tighter against him and make sure nothing more bad happens to him.

**Author's Note:**

> mmyeah. I remember not being entirely satisfied of this os but I still wanted to post it (and to translate it, it's still the first part of a serie that is dear to my heart). I can still say it doesn't entirely satisifes me and i'm scared you don't like it too (the next parts are better i swear)
> 
> Thanks for reading this !
> 
> (It's a serie that will have ships such as Pierre/Charles, Sebastian/Lewis and Daniil/Valtteri, the parts are one after the others but you're not obligated to follow every ship if you only desire to read about one.)


End file.
